Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy - Stop Comparing Yourself To Others!

Comparing ourselves to others is something we have been conditioned into doing and that takes up so much of our time. It seems almost impossible for us to go a day without wishing we could look like someone else, or even just be that person entirely.
We walk down the streets and think, "I wish my legs looked like hers." We scroll through social media and think, "I wish I was as rich as him." We turn on TV and think, "I wish I was as talented as them." We spend time with our friends and family and think, "I wish I was as funny as them." There really is no end to it. We are always staring at others and longing to acquire their beauty, their sense of humour, their fashion sense, their wealth, their success, their lifestyles... it's as if we are never enough for ourselves and it is truly heartbreaking how we never seem to be happy in who we are and always want to be someone, anyone, other than who were born to be.
It's a vicious cycle, too, seeing as though pretty much everyone on the planet is comparing themselves to others. Whilst you're busy wanting to be someone, someone else is busy want to be YOU. Everyone is jealous of what other people have and how they look in some form... but where does that get us?

If every member of the human race is wishing to be another member of the human race, then what does that mean? It means no one is truly being themselves and it also means no one will ever be truly happy or comfortable in their own skin because we're always reaching to obtain things that we can't have because they were not meant for us. We're always longing for physically attributes, possessions and lifestyles that were not given to us for a reason. What good comes from this? No one benefits from this because it only makes us miserable when we waste so much time hoping for things that will never happen or even going to extreme lengths to transform ourselves into other people completely.

The only thing that benefits from the unhappiness we feel when we compare ourselves to others is society and the forces that tell you only one ideal of 'beauty' exists. The only real winner are the negative forces that want you to see others are your competition... even though they are not.

Society does not deserve to feel such satisfaction and it's time to start rewriting the rules and changing how we see one another. It's time to view others as our friends, not our competitors, because there is no prize to be won. We are, ultimately, all working towards the same goal, happiness, but the only way for us to acquire it is to be US, not someone else. And we needn't compete with others to reach a state of self happiness because there is absolutely enough for everyone to have some.

Even though it's heartbreaking that people compare themselves to others 24/7, you should also remember that it's nothing to feel ashamed of. It's completely normal and it's just another human emotion. The fact that you're able to compare yourself to others shows you possess the ability to question things, which is a wonderful skill to have, however, one thing that you should never question is yourself. 

YOU are enough just as you are. You do not need to walk, talk, look or act like anybody else because the cliche is true, the world would be so boring if everyone were just carbon copies of one another. You do not need to change who you are in order to be like someone else, you do not need to look like someone else in order to be successful or happy in life. You are you for a reason and the only time you should change something about yourself is to make yourself happy for the right reasons, not because you feel forced to or because you want to squish yourself into a mould.

Learning to stop comparing yourself to others isn't going to happen overnight, especially when it's been drilled into you since birth that that's the normal thing to do. However, with a little bit of time, patience and practise, it IS possible for you to live a life free from comparison. It IS possible for you to appreciate the beauty of other people without questioning your own and to compliment them without feeling insecure. Dishing out compliments is great, but know that the person on the receiving end is never your enemy and that YOU are just as worthy of hearing lovely things about you as they are. With a little self belief and a lot of uplifting others, you will come to see that everyone else is equal to you, not better.

Instead of spending your precious energy on comparing yourself to others, try using that energy to combat unrealistic beauty standards, sexism, diet culture, toxic advertisements and all the forces that tell us we are not worthy of self love because of who we are or how we look. By working together, we can dismantle harmful, oppressive institutions to shape a world in which people are happy to compliment others because it won't negatively impact on how they perceive themselves.

EVERYONE deserves to live a full life, not a life of questioning, questioning whether they are good enough, pretty enough, smart enough, rich enough, brave enough, strong enough, slim enough, confident enough... because beauty, success and happiness come in a million different forms. Regardless of your shape, size, gender, sexuality, skin colour, religion, disability and SO much more, you are beautiful in your own unique ways, both on the inside and out, and you add value to this world by being who YOU are, not who you think you should be or by being someone else. You were put on this Earth for a reason and life is too short to spend it comparing yourself to others. Comparison is a thief. It steals away your joy. Do not let it. You are awesome, just like everyone else who you look at and long to be. Let them be them whilst you are you. We are all on our own individual paths and there is enough room for all of us to grow because, as the saying goes, "A flower does not think about competing with the flower next to it, it just blooms." So, go bloom.

Love, Emily 

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